Soccer Time

Another great game for the Stingrays! They kids played great and scored some goals.

I was texting with Shawn last night around 11 pm and he asked if we were going to the game. (Daddy is out west hunting, but returning home today.) I immediately felt sick to my stomach because I had completely forgotten about the game with everything else going on. I was so thankful it was a 10 am game and not at 9 am so the kids could sleep until 8 am. We all got baths this morning and we were on time...success! :)

My Hope is in You, Lord

This morning at 9:45 Shawn was getting ready to leave to go dove hunting for the weekend.  We gathered together for prayer time and prayed for safe traveling mercies for Daddy, Nana's health and Shannon's interview to go well. We gave hugs and kisses and he was out the door.

I tended to the kids and a few minutes later I looked down at my phone and I had 3 or 4 missed calls and a text...that is never a good feeling.  I called my sister back and she was crying and told me that Nana was taken to the emergency room this morning because she was having trouble breathing.  I immediately called my mom and she and my dad were on their way up to the hospital.  My mom told me that my Nana was unconscious when my Aunt Kathleen was with her a few minutes before.  This was at 10 am.  I got the kids dressed, packed a bag for the day, got around and we hit the road.

We left the house about 11:15 and my sister road with us.  We got to the hospital around 12:40 and I saw my Uncle Billy and asked him "is she still the same, how is she?"  He responded with "she passed away."  My mom didn't want to tell us since we would be driving, but she passed away around 10:45 am.  Tears began to flow.  I just didn't expect that at all.  I thought she'd pull through like she always does, but her poor body was done and she is now resting in peace with Jesus and Poppa. 

After a couple of hours we headed back to my Nana's house where we cooked fajitas and visited.  Whenever the Smith family gathers together you better bet there will always be something cookin' and it will be delicious and plenty of it!!  I hate that this occasion is what pulled us back together to see one another, but it was nice to talk and just be there for one another during this time.  Everyone is hurting and had their own special relationship with Nana.  While she was a feisty one, she was a loving one.  She always had time for her children, her grandchildren and even her great-grandchildren.

So many memories of you and I will cherish them until I see you again in heaven.  Thank you for all the laughs and love Phil...I love you and miss you dearly.



A little 4 Wheeler action while getting the food ready

My little cousin, Corey, brought his guitar and broke it out and sang a few songs.  While playing he made up a country song about my Nana on the spot...it was perfect.  We were all outside sitting around and the words spoke truth about my Nana.  Wish I had the words to share, but they were perfect.


Corey singing a song to honor Nana and Allyson swinging away to the sweet words

While we were outside Jase looked at me and said "we're having a little celebrate" and I said "yes, yes we are babe."  So sweet.  While only 4 years old Jase knew exactly what was going on.  We were celebrating Nana's life.  

The song "My Hope is in You" by Aaron Shust has been on heavy on my mind lately.  The words speak to me and especially during this time of need.  I just keep replaying it and replaying it.  It comes from Psalm 62:5 "My soul, wait in silence for God only, For my hope is from Him."  Such truth...my hope is in Him.  There is nothing else to cling to at this time or anytime for that matter. 

My hope is in you, Lord
All the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm

A peace that passes understanding is my song
And I sing
My hope is in you, Lord

I will wait on you
You are my refuge
I will wait on you
You are my refuge

http://youtu.be/8cP1hzoJ41o

Success is...

I was thinking about success today for some reason and thought I'd share. It comes in all sizes: big and small.  And while most of my successes lately are small, they mean a lot to me and to God...I know He is cheering me on.

We have been pretty busy lately and haven't gotten around to mowing the yard, and since the rain on Sunday/Monday it has really grown.  Monday we had Jase's soccer practice, Tuesday Shawn got home late and tonight we had church.  So, last night I mentioned to Shawn that I could mow it Wednesday while the kids are at school.  He offered to weed-eat for me real quick last night (it was basically dark out) since our weed-eater weighs like 100 pounds and it is not my friend.  LOL!  After I did my running around this morning I came home, ate lunch and changed clothes and prepared to mow.  As I am getting out the lawn mower I am reminded of our first lawn mower we owned.  You basically pulled your arm out of socket every time you went to start it.  I mean you had to pull it like 30-50 times before it would start...no joke, ask my sister! And once you started it, you wouldn't dare cut it off because it would not start again.  I remember accidentally cutting it off too soon and still having half of the front yard to do...lovely.  You either weed-eat the rest of the yard or wait forever and pray that the lawn mower would start back up.

Back to pulling out the mower.  I pushed the bulb to get the gas going a few times and then pulled the rope back to start 'er up...and nothing.  Ugh...here we go.  I pulled it a few more times...still nothing.  I pushed the bulb like 5 more times, hoping I didn't flood the engine.  After pulling the rope a few times...she started right up!  Success is starting the lawn mower all by myself.  I was so happy...I'm not going to even pretend I wasn't.  It was awesome.

Today my sister interviewed for a teaching position at the school where I taught at for two years before I decided to stay at home with my children.  We have been praying for God's will with her career and knew that something would fall through when the time was right.  I was on and off the phone with her all afternoon getting the "play by play" of events going on.  Then the call that she got the job.  Success!  Praise God!  So happy for her.  She is going to be a great teacher.  She is so dedicated and I know that she will be committed to her team, students and school.  I'm so excited for her to start her career.

So, it is no surprise that I have struggled with my weight my whole life.  I remember my body went through "the change" in between my 7th and 8th grade year and I was a little more curvy than before.  I was sitting in band class in 8th grade at the beginning of the school year (before you even form an opinion about me being in the band, all of the "cool" kids were in band at my JH!) and a girl lean over to me and said "either you lost a lot of weight or you are sucking in."  WOW!  I have prayed on this matter many times, but I still remember that comment from 1993.  Words can definitely hurt.

After graduating high school, I stopped playing softball and stopped being active and the pounds piled on.  I was the heaviest at my wedding, 60+ pounds since HS.  Not great timing with the weight gain, but it is what it is.  I have tried so many diets and bought so many exercise DVDs, it's not even funny.  Ok, well a little funny!! It's like I would stay on something for a month or two or a week, then get off, lose, gain, lose, gain.  I found a picture of myself last week when I was at my heaviest and it was a full body picture, head to toe and I was in shorts.  I mean, it didn't even look like me and I didn't even know I ever looked like that.  Crazy how we have a mental picture and how we envision ourselves.

Last week I started reading "Made to Crave" by Lysa TerKeurst and it talks about satisfying your deepest desire with God, not food.  It is a great book and I definitely recommend it.  While it is geared more toward women, I've read several chapters to Shawn and the principles can be applied to men as well and he enjoyed listening to it.  While I wish I could sit here and type the whole book for you (might be some plagiarism issues with that), here are a few things that have stood out for me thus far:

• What if God is using my weight to draw me closer to Him?  Some people may have a weakness with drugs, alcohol or depression, but mine seems to be food.  He has been trying to get my attention this whole time.  
• God wants us to crave Him and not food.  Look back to Eve and what she was tempted with from the very beginning...food...an apple from the forbidden tree.  God knew that food would be a temptation from the beginning.  This struggle is not new and can be conquered through Him.
• I can have victory over my food cravings.  I have asked and prayed God to help me with my food choices and have come to realize that the devil certainly is real and will get in your thoughts and try to talk you into bad choices or tell you why you can't do something because of your old habits.  All the more reason to pray and ask God to help you and to have God's word readily available at all times to lean upon.

While I am far away from my goal weight and to be honest, I have no idea what my goal weight should be.  I feel good in the way I am eating and have had small successes that encourage me to keep pushing on.  Every meal and every craving is a test, but with God's help I know I can do this.

For he satisfieth the longing soul, and filleth the hungry soul with goodness. Psalm 107:9

I delight to do thy will, O my God: yea, thy law is within my heart.  Psalm 40:8

Finished Half Bath!! :)

We started our bathroom revamp in early July and I can finally say that we are finished!! So happy! We pulled down wallpaper, sanded the walls, re-textured, painted the walls and trim, put in all new hardware (faucet, toilet paper holder, towel holder and light fixture), and installed new components inside the toilet.  Whew!!  So thankful for my wonderful husband who helped out so much and did a lot of the not-so-fun jobs.  It definitely would not have been completed without you!

Before pics



The After!



We have a GOOOOOAAAALLLLLL!!

This morning was Jase's second soccer game of the season and he did great...his whole team did!! They were aggressive and played together as a team.  During the second half the other team had just scored a goal, so we were back in the middle (excuse my non-soccer terminology...I am still learning!) to kick it off and it was Jase's turn to kick it.  He pulled his leg back and kicked it hard, straight through the defenders and right in the GOOOOAAALLLLL!!  So happy for him!! :)  First goal of the season!

Jase had quite the crowd this morning.  Aunt Alisha, Uncle Joseph (came on his birthday!), Jay, Michelle, Nanny, and Grandpa & Grandma Leonard were there to support Jase!!  Aunt Alisha made Allyson a shirt and it was super cute!! The front had Stingrays with a soccer ball and the back had Allyson! Absolutely love it, thanks Aunt Alisha!

You've Got Mail

Both kids love to check the mail everyday.  If we are coming home and it is time to check the mail, then Jase checks it from inside the car since it's on his side.  This is his new thing I am letting him do and he loves it and thinks he is so big.  Our mail usually runs late, so most of the time me and the kiddos walk outside and check it together.  Allyson loves to inspect every piece of mail and usually claims one piece as her own.

Ally said "oh pizza, yum!"

This morning Allyson and I rode to Livingston to visit Nana and I'm so glad that we did.  We spoke about fond memories we have of one another and I was able to read a tribute letter I wrote to her.  We held hands and I cried the whole time I read it, but I'm so glad I was able to thank her for being her and being there for me.  And she just lit up as Allyson danced around the room.  My little Ally is such a joy and I'm glad that she was able to visit with her great grandmother one more time.

A Walk in the Park

Today I took the kids to the park for a little exercise and to eat lunch outdoors.  There is one section at the park where there is a playground and surrounding it is a circular sidewalk.  I thought, oh that will be great to take the kids to and they can play I can walk.  The circle is not that big (.07 tenths of a mile to be exact...thanks Hubby) so it is very easy to watch the kids while I walk.  That's what I thought.

Jase thinks he needs to get some exercise so he runs in front of me (below) and does jumping jacks...it was cute.  Then Ally must think I am running off and starts running after me.  I held her hand and walked for about 10 seconds and then she tells me "I want to hold you" so up she goes to the right hip.  This is a new workout I like to do...brisk walk with a 25 pounder on your hip...doesn't last very long.  I am able to make it about 5 times around the circle in the midst of pushing kiddos on the swings and reassuring Ally that Mommy isn't leaving, then it's lunch time!!

While sitting at the table I explained to Jase that I was trying to walk and get some exercise, get in shape, get fit.  He understood exercise, but asked "what is get in shape?"  I so did not want to get in the "your mommy needs to drop some weight" conversation with my 4 year old and definitely didn't want to use the "F" word, so I told him that Mommy needed to work on her muscles to make them big and strong.  I made a fast escape on that one!

After lunch I attempted to walk again.  My little shadow was soon chasing after me and Jase found the oranges so he was preoccupied.  I then remembered my phone...I turned on a Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and they were good to go...thank you YouTube!! I was able to get a good walk in, so it actually turned out nice.  I might have a new spot to go if my phone is charged! :)